Great week for guilt! Just when you thought that over a decade of reality show braggadocio and pervasive, unexplained millenial optimism had eroded all signs of adults taking responsibilities for their actions, folks are pleading guilty everywhere.

In China, a politician’s wife says: “Yeah, I poisoned the guy!”

In Tuscon, the shooter of Gabby Giffords says: “I shot her, but I fucked up ‘cuz the Congresswoman is still alive!”

In Montana, former Arkansas coach Bobby Petrino says: “I don’t know how infidelity happened to me.”

Coming Soon: Bashar al-Assad of Syria, the ghost of Joe Paterno, and James Holmes of Aurora, Colorado?